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Nov. 6th, 2002 04:45 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
elvendollanother day...
i barely kept my eyes open on the drive in. and with the rain over my windshield, driving with half-open eyes was really frightening. i tried slapping myself, but it just wouldn't work. especially as i have a wisdom tooth giving me grief on my right side, and my left hand just isn't as strong.
but hey, i made it in alive, didn't i?
and yeah, wisdom tooth hurts. i'm not sure if the tooth is impacted or if its just the pain of the gum being torn away as the tooth is coming up. and yeah, i know i need to see a dentist. if the pain gets any worse today, i'll check into getting an appointment for tomorrow morning, and if not, i'll schedule it for next week.
and i should really get off my butt about my eyes. my bad eye has been puffy in the mornings, and i've found myself closing it when reading a couple of times, which i think is definitely a bad sign.
yesterday's left me with a lot of mixed feelings.
after work, i picked him and we went to see his mom at a rehabilitation hospital, where she's being prepped for a couple of surgeries.
the place itself was very nice, and from everything she said, they were treating her really well and the treatments sounded good. but there was a couple of times where she seemed to be close to tearing, which was hard to see. and then when we were leaving, she asked if she could be snuck out in jedi's jacket : / and i just keep imagining what it must be like to be in her situation. to be in constant pain, facing scary surgery and be made to live in a hospital, away from your family *shudder*
on the other hand, it also made me realize that in some ways, other people's family is kinda like other people's kids. maybe its just me, but i found it a lot easier to be patient and deal with being introduced to everyone on the floor then i have with my grandparents in similar situations (but then again, its also been a while) and i think some of that comes from not feeling like i'm obligated to be there.
i ended up getting home a few minutes after 9, with a toothache, a headache, hungry and tired.
i feel incredibly shitty over it, but i didn't get my homework done : /
i stumbled between the tube and the computer till around 11:30, feeling like i'm barely keeping myself from passing out... forced myself into the shower, which made me feel better while i was in there, but after i got out, i just chatted online instead of being a good kid. *raar*
i definitely need to get this done tonight.
the sad thing is, i've picked a pretty easy scene to do, and it should take an hour, max, to get everything done. i just have to get over feeling intimidated - because the bottom line is, this thing doesn't get graded. i just need to do it. i need to plow through this stuff to leave myself extra time for the papers, damnit.
had the thought of seeing spirited away with my sister this weekend, but just saw that its not playing anywhere near my parents' house. but, i also noticed that tuck everlasting is pg. *giggle* now i won't have to torture any of my friends with it : )
i think this is the most conscious fall into sad i've taken thus far. the biggest difference is that i'm having a really hard time distinguishing what is "real" and what is sad, which leads to looping indecision and feeling stifled about how to act - i am really paranoid about "acting out" but at the same time, i don't know what is and what isn't. and, of course, i'm scared about what effect being in this loop will have.
the odd thing about fighting depression is that i feel like i'm going in at half strength - that i'm "tired" and if i take time to "rest", i'll do better at it. the fact that i know this isn't true doesn't help a thing.
i'm just hoping march comes quickly.
but, for happy thoughts, the tori amos concert is getting closer, and after that comes the trip to SD, which i am ecstatic about. i just hope i get enough quality time with everyone i will be seeing. after that, i'll have to get on the ball about securing plans for a winter vacation.
so i missed both buffy and rasputina last night.
for some reason, i thought buffy was at 9, and was surprised when i saw it go on at 8 on the hospital tv. luckily for me, she rocks - she taped it and will let me borrow the tape : )
and i totally spaced rasputina was last night. an email netgoth swallowed and regurgitated reminded me at 11:50. i called him, expecting to catch him at the show and take out my angst by giving him shit for not reminding me, but he forgot about it too. misery loves company, i guess.
and last but not least, i hate being broken.
i barely kept my eyes open on the drive in. and with the rain over my windshield, driving with half-open eyes was really frightening. i tried slapping myself, but it just wouldn't work. especially as i have a wisdom tooth giving me grief on my right side, and my left hand just isn't as strong.
but hey, i made it in alive, didn't i?
and yeah, wisdom tooth hurts. i'm not sure if the tooth is impacted or if its just the pain of the gum being torn away as the tooth is coming up. and yeah, i know i need to see a dentist. if the pain gets any worse today, i'll check into getting an appointment for tomorrow morning, and if not, i'll schedule it for next week.
and i should really get off my butt about my eyes. my bad eye has been puffy in the mornings, and i've found myself closing it when reading a couple of times, which i think is definitely a bad sign.
yesterday's left me with a lot of mixed feelings.
after work, i picked him and we went to see his mom at a rehabilitation hospital, where she's being prepped for a couple of surgeries.
the place itself was very nice, and from everything she said, they were treating her really well and the treatments sounded good. but there was a couple of times where she seemed to be close to tearing, which was hard to see. and then when we were leaving, she asked if she could be snuck out in jedi's jacket : / and i just keep imagining what it must be like to be in her situation. to be in constant pain, facing scary surgery and be made to live in a hospital, away from your family *shudder*
on the other hand, it also made me realize that in some ways, other people's family is kinda like other people's kids. maybe its just me, but i found it a lot easier to be patient and deal with being introduced to everyone on the floor then i have with my grandparents in similar situations (but then again, its also been a while) and i think some of that comes from not feeling like i'm obligated to be there.
i ended up getting home a few minutes after 9, with a toothache, a headache, hungry and tired.
i feel incredibly shitty over it, but i didn't get my homework done : /
i stumbled between the tube and the computer till around 11:30, feeling like i'm barely keeping myself from passing out... forced myself into the shower, which made me feel better while i was in there, but after i got out, i just chatted online instead of being a good kid. *raar*
i definitely need to get this done tonight.
the sad thing is, i've picked a pretty easy scene to do, and it should take an hour, max, to get everything done. i just have to get over feeling intimidated - because the bottom line is, this thing doesn't get graded. i just need to do it. i need to plow through this stuff to leave myself extra time for the papers, damnit.
had the thought of seeing spirited away with my sister this weekend, but just saw that its not playing anywhere near my parents' house. but, i also noticed that tuck everlasting is pg. *giggle* now i won't have to torture any of my friends with it : )
i think this is the most conscious fall into sad i've taken thus far. the biggest difference is that i'm having a really hard time distinguishing what is "real" and what is sad, which leads to looping indecision and feeling stifled about how to act - i am really paranoid about "acting out" but at the same time, i don't know what is and what isn't. and, of course, i'm scared about what effect being in this loop will have.
the odd thing about fighting depression is that i feel like i'm going in at half strength - that i'm "tired" and if i take time to "rest", i'll do better at it. the fact that i know this isn't true doesn't help a thing.
i'm just hoping march comes quickly.
but, for happy thoughts, the tori amos concert is getting closer, and after that comes the trip to SD, which i am ecstatic about. i just hope i get enough quality time with everyone i will be seeing. after that, i'll have to get on the ball about securing plans for a winter vacation.
so i missed both buffy and rasputina last night.
for some reason, i thought buffy was at 9, and was surprised when i saw it go on at 8 on the hospital tv. luckily for me, she rocks - she taped it and will let me borrow the tape : )
and i totally spaced rasputina was last night. an email netgoth swallowed and regurgitated reminded me at 11:50. i called him, expecting to catch him at the show and take out my angst by giving him shit for not reminding me, but he forgot about it too. misery loves company, i guess.
and last but not least, i hate being broken.
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no subject
Date: 2002-11-06 02:31 pm (UTC)yulia is a single ukrainian woman
yulia is a good student and likes to acquire and study technical material for each subject
yulia is a healthy young lady
yulia is a single young christian girl from java
yulia is worried about her new baby
yulia is russian variant of european name
yulia is scheduled to skate at the evening of champions
yulia is a very intelligent girl
yulia is a joy for the lens
yulia is getting on bus #50 to go to work at the veterinary clinic where she works tuesdays
yulia is buying piroshki
yulia is totally educated on her condition and her options
yulia is in the 12th grade
yulia is not a surprise
yulia is an uzbekistanian national living in uzbekistan who speaks english
yulia is an ukranian national living in belarus who speaks dutch
yulia is now in st
yulia is 26
yulia is a kazakhstani university student living in ust
yulia is a yung russian skater
yulia is a tiny pixie of a pair skater
to be continued
no subject
Date: 2002-11-06 02:32 pm (UTC)yulia is a client in
yulia is checked at the cocc clinic by staff pediatrician
yulia is my very best friend in the whole world
yulia is from rostov
yulia is sensitive and gentle
yulia is staying in bed with droppers
yulia is known to have closed her old internet business and opened her new internet business in a matter of days
yulia is one of 95 youngsters who have completed the first five months of a jewish agency chalom program
yulia is one of 90 youngsters who have completed the first five months of a jafi chalom program
yulia is a college student learning the ways of the world while the world is learning all about her curves
yulia is a great reader
yulia is a very approachable character
yulia is active in regional ngos and serves as project manger for ?radiation monitoring of chelyabinsk region?
yulia is a head of ottawa branch of children of chornobyl canadian foundation
yulia is trusted by
yulia is now involved in a project to design and implemet a system for automatic classification and counting of marine zooplankton
yulia is a native of chernigov
yulia is one of our flex students who was selected to participate in the "close
yulia is real a ballarina
yulia is ready to start
yulia is in her mid
yulia is intelligent
yulia is a former national russian acrobatic champion and trained for 5 years at the olympic academy in moscow
yulia is one of miss kittys biggest stage stars
yulia is studying to be a cook but also wants to study to become a plasterer
yulia is very petite and actually far better looking than her photos would suggest
yulia is smart
yulia is survived by her parents and sister
yulia is survived by her brother
yulia is a market analyst and small business support specialist
yulia is the advertising manager for a sales department promoting wholesale materials from russia
yulia is serious in the gym and a very hard worker
yulia is responsible for a wide variety of tasks including placing all graduate school hardware and software requests
yulia is a german dj who's been playing hard
yulia is such a charming young lady
yulia is a superb pair skater
yulia is originally from st
yulia is on the floor while lena is standing up
yulia is wasting away
yulia is ook door ons zelf gefokt
yulia is miss russia
yulia is a recipient of a full international scholarship
yulia is an enthusiastic young specialist strongly oriented towards successful carrier in recruitment
yulia is one of our english
yulia is performing really well
yulia is currently on maternity leave from her new job as the manager for american operations for the british council
yulia is employed as a secretary
yulia is a friend of our former moscow correspondent
yulia is a dynamic and passionate person
yulia is the artistic visionary who designed hyperpoo in all of its copyright
yulia is she doesn't know it
yulia is a russian woman in her mid
yulia is willing to do light housework
yulia is to the left of molly and eyesha is across the table from molly
yulia is our friend
yulia is known for seriousness in the gym
yulia is a bad idea
yulia is a russian student in our group and showed us great hospitality
yulia is there as well
yulia is one of 22 hillel students who have been specially trained to be
yulia is preoccupied with finding the ideal graduate job
yulia is committed to randy critzer
yulia is looking gorgeous
yulia is also contained
yulia is one to watch
yulia is presently staying with dungannon couple martin and carmel mckenna and a fund has been set up to allow yulia to travel from chervin to dungannon
yulia is currently continuing for an ma in art history at hebrew university
yulia is definitely the last beauty any man will ever encounter