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elvendoll*sigh*
i don't know...
every day has been up and down, up and down...
there's this horrible feeling that i'm not doing enough, not being productive enough thats always there... ironically, keeping me from doing more...
sometimes it feels like i spend hours just trying to keep that feeling, that anxiety, at bay...
the job search is going slower then i'd hoped.
all i got from the place i really want to go is a card saying they got my resume.
posted my resume on a couple of online places, all i got was a call from 1 headhunter... gotta call him back later on today...
still no word from the other places i sent my resume, too... i think its about time to go to headhunters, see what they can do for me..
other then that, things are.... well, still up and down...
i've been trying to clean up a little more around the house... trying not to take out my low moments on bill..
and bill has been so wonderful...
yesterday was an odd day... i forgot my morning pills, and for some reason the afternoon ones took longer then usual to kick in...
i made it more or less okay till when bill came home, though going to the supermarket was a way tougher struggle then it should have been, but by 7ish, all i wanted was tobe in bed...
so i spent over 3 hours, just laying there, passing in and out of sleep, totally unable to move during the wakeful moments.. it was like i was sedated or something. odd.
sunday was interesting too...
bill's work got out before it should have, and my grandmother took a bit of a liberty talking about my plans, so bill ended up going with me to a relative's house...
bill found it rather odd and intimidating, as this is the first time he's ever met any of my relatives, and there was a bit of a language barrier, but i think overall it went okay...
i don't know...
every day has been up and down, up and down...
there's this horrible feeling that i'm not doing enough, not being productive enough thats always there... ironically, keeping me from doing more...
sometimes it feels like i spend hours just trying to keep that feeling, that anxiety, at bay...
the job search is going slower then i'd hoped.
all i got from the place i really want to go is a card saying they got my resume.
posted my resume on a couple of online places, all i got was a call from 1 headhunter... gotta call him back later on today...
still no word from the other places i sent my resume, too... i think its about time to go to headhunters, see what they can do for me..
other then that, things are.... well, still up and down...
i've been trying to clean up a little more around the house... trying not to take out my low moments on bill..
and bill has been so wonderful...
yesterday was an odd day... i forgot my morning pills, and for some reason the afternoon ones took longer then usual to kick in...
i made it more or less okay till when bill came home, though going to the supermarket was a way tougher struggle then it should have been, but by 7ish, all i wanted was tobe in bed...
so i spent over 3 hours, just laying there, passing in and out of sleep, totally unable to move during the wakeful moments.. it was like i was sedated or something. odd.
sunday was interesting too...
bill's work got out before it should have, and my grandmother took a bit of a liberty talking about my plans, so bill ended up going with me to a relative's house...
bill found it rather odd and intimidating, as this is the first time he's ever met any of my relatives, and there was a bit of a language barrier, but i think overall it went okay...
