getting back into the swing...
Mar. 25th, 2004 11:15 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
elvendolland it's almost like stepping out of a fog.
going out last night was really good for me.
good to see![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
halo, good to see people and get some hugs, good to spend time interacting with people and not feel awkward/out of place. big thanks to developer and his k. for the travel conversation - i was having a hard time finding my prague excitement and now it's totally been rekindled : )
and, good to have beer. i've definitely been in a strong beer phase for close to a year now - probably the strongest i've been in since before the getting drunk at 16 incident.
the evening didn't exactly go as planned -sol3 and i took much longer with dinner then we expected to, and then spent more time being out then we expected to and thus got to his place much later then we thought we would, and then he had to spend time geeking while i went to bed early. and while i'm sad that we didn't get an evening of mellow snuggles before i go away, i'm more goodsurprised at how well i was able to handle the situation - i'd had a good evening, and when a part of it went wonky, my reaction was totally sane, rather then having less-then-sane pullings and reasoning myself out of acting on them or being pouty. after the last couple of weeks, it's an unbelievably good feeling/thing.
and, my whole body was somehow really off. besides having my period be almost two weeks late while having pms-from-hell, i'd gained weight last month. over the past couple of days, i've felt my metabolism notch up all on it's own, and it feels like i've lost a half an inch around my waist already - and that's making me excited to go back to yoga tonight.
last night was our last class before the midterm.
the professor told us that the midterm will be based more on lectures then the reading - which is good, not only because i'm behind, but also because he hasn't talked about it, so there's no indication of which aspects he'd emphasize.
then, he tells us that even if we'd missed all the lectures until now, it'd be possible to do well on the test just by paying close attention to the day's lecture - which is good in some ways, but really startling in others.
he then mentions that his undergrads (real harvard students) get these same lectures, but also have a discussion period to talk about the reading - and he hasn't modified his lectures at all to fit with the extension course - which explains a whole bunch.
he also hasn't mentioned any changes to the syllabus since changing the midterm date - originally, our last class was supposed to be the 28th of April, but the midterm's been moved up by a week.
and, it still feels too short/shallow - 3 or 4 classes after the midterm, and then we write a 15 page paper - and we haven't even reached 8-page depth in class.
but, the all around good news is that i'm much less stressed about the midterm now.
my mom has the weirdest sense of logic, and a knack for losing diamonds.
she got an antique diamond ring when we lived in california, and gave it to me a few years ago.
it was too big for me, and my stepdad put a spacer into it - only i broke it, and then the second one.
so, the ring went back to my mom's house to get resized. my mom kept forgetting to do it, and started wearing the ring in the meanwhile - until the diamond dropped out.
after another while, the ring was sent to a family friend who happens to be a jeweler, and that was the last anyone had seen of it in some time.
finally, my mom got around to asking my stepdad's mom about when it could be picked up - only to be told that it had ben, and that she (stepdad's mother) was sure that she had given it to us.
only she hasn't.
so, the first theory is that it is somehow lost/misplaced at her house.
the second theory is that my stepdad's sister ended up with it - which is a thought that makes me really angry, because everyone once in a while, really shady stuff happens around her, but noone wants to create as big of a blowup as confronting her would be.
but, the point is that the ring is gone.
so, my mom, who happens to be just as broke as i am (to the point that we were discussing the logistics of both of us hitting up my grandfather for some cash*), told me that i should look for an antique ring while in prague and that it would be her treat - and i still can't wrap my mind around that. when i'm broke, i simply can't spend money on frivolous stuff for myself, and i can't wrap around how that's different for her.
* while i am 99% self sufficient, i did take my grandfather up on the family's perpetual offer to cover my tuition once last year, and am thinking of doing it for one class this year. a lot of the reason they want to pay for it is that they want me to be comfortable and the agreement is that if i let them know i need the help when i do, they don't worry/stress/feel guilty about me being 99% self-sufficient, which goes against their cultural values.
going out last night was really good for me.
good to see
halo, good to see people and get some hugs, good to spend time interacting with people and not feel awkward/out of place. big thanks to developer and his k. for the travel conversation - i was having a hard time finding my prague excitement and now it's totally been rekindled : )and, good to have beer. i've definitely been in a strong beer phase for close to a year now - probably the strongest i've been in since before the getting drunk at 16 incident.
the evening didn't exactly go as planned -
sol3 and i took much longer with dinner then we expected to, and then spent more time being out then we expected to and thus got to his place much later then we thought we would, and then he had to spend time geeking while i went to bed early. and while i'm sad that we didn't get an evening of mellow snuggles before i go away, i'm more goodsurprised at how well i was able to handle the situation - i'd had a good evening, and when a part of it went wonky, my reaction was totally sane, rather then having less-then-sane pullings and reasoning myself out of acting on them or being pouty. after the last couple of weeks, it's an unbelievably good feeling/thing.and, my whole body was somehow really off. besides having my period be almost two weeks late while having pms-from-hell, i'd gained weight last month. over the past couple of days, i've felt my metabolism notch up all on it's own, and it feels like i've lost a half an inch around my waist already - and that's making me excited to go back to yoga tonight.
last night was our last class before the midterm.
the professor told us that the midterm will be based more on lectures then the reading - which is good, not only because i'm behind, but also because he hasn't talked about it, so there's no indication of which aspects he'd emphasize.
then, he tells us that even if we'd missed all the lectures until now, it'd be possible to do well on the test just by paying close attention to the day's lecture - which is good in some ways, but really startling in others.
he then mentions that his undergrads (real harvard students) get these same lectures, but also have a discussion period to talk about the reading - and he hasn't modified his lectures at all to fit with the extension course - which explains a whole bunch.
he also hasn't mentioned any changes to the syllabus since changing the midterm date - originally, our last class was supposed to be the 28th of April, but the midterm's been moved up by a week.
and, it still feels too short/shallow - 3 or 4 classes after the midterm, and then we write a 15 page paper - and we haven't even reached 8-page depth in class.
but, the all around good news is that i'm much less stressed about the midterm now.
my mom has the weirdest sense of logic, and a knack for losing diamonds.
she got an antique diamond ring when we lived in california, and gave it to me a few years ago.
it was too big for me, and my stepdad put a spacer into it - only i broke it, and then the second one.
so, the ring went back to my mom's house to get resized. my mom kept forgetting to do it, and started wearing the ring in the meanwhile - until the diamond dropped out.
after another while, the ring was sent to a family friend who happens to be a jeweler, and that was the last anyone had seen of it in some time.
finally, my mom got around to asking my stepdad's mom about when it could be picked up - only to be told that it had ben, and that she (stepdad's mother) was sure that she had given it to us.
only she hasn't.
so, the first theory is that it is somehow lost/misplaced at her house.
the second theory is that my stepdad's sister ended up with it - which is a thought that makes me really angry, because everyone once in a while, really shady stuff happens around her, but noone wants to create as big of a blowup as confronting her would be.
but, the point is that the ring is gone.
so, my mom, who happens to be just as broke as i am (to the point that we were discussing the logistics of both of us hitting up my grandfather for some cash*), told me that i should look for an antique ring while in prague and that it would be her treat - and i still can't wrap my mind around that. when i'm broke, i simply can't spend money on frivolous stuff for myself, and i can't wrap around how that's different for her.
* while i am 99% self sufficient, i did take my grandfather up on the family's perpetual offer to cover my tuition once last year, and am thinking of doing it for one class this year. a lot of the reason they want to pay for it is that they want me to be comfortable and the agreement is that if i let them know i need the help when i do, they don't worry/stress/feel guilty about me being 99% self-sufficient, which goes against their cultural values.
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Chest' (not to be confused with chest) - Honor
Date: 2004-03-25 10:09 am (UTC)The point of the story is - don't be proud and honorable. take the money from your relatives. they will be happy because they will feel like they are helping. you will save some $$ that you need anyway.
P.S. if you don't need the $$, i could take it. :-)
Re: Chest' (not to be confused with chest) - Honor
Date: 2004-03-25 11:07 am (UTC)it's such culture shock from 'typical american' values, but my family feels guilty for not supporting me - and over the years, i've always refused offers of "help" by saying 'i'll let you know when i need it' - twice in two years is a bit much for my taste, but coughing up nearly $1800 (more then that, once you add books) can't be pretty for anyone.