(no subject)

[elvendoll]

blah
i am being lazy.. totally out of not wanting to do anything else...
i'm really rather not happy bill isn't here today. makes me wish i had another outlet or just something, and feel really incompetent that i don't... i am trying really hard nott o sit here remembering how things used to be last winter. that would just be a bad thing.
*raar*
a part of me keeps thinking that i should have just said no when he asked if he could go... but i know thats not right, either...
and i know there was other stuff i wanted to write about when i opened this wondow, but its not in my head anymore... i really hate it when that happens.
*sigh*

and i just did a bad thing... i called kevin's house to talk to bill... and to make things worse, he's not there. worse in that 'i'm still trying to recover from trust issues' kind of way... because no matter how much i knwo that he's got lots of friends in nashua he could be visiting, my head just goes elsewhere...
somebody please put me out of my misery?
or hell, at least turn ont he fucking heat?!